[J22-Fleet 1] Fwd: Smart Women and Math

[Carmen Velarde]

      I like this one
   
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Barnie B  wrote: 
  Subject: Smart Women and Math
Date: Mon, 6 Feb 2006 11:48:02 -0600

         
  

  ROMANCE  MATHEMATICS 
Smart man + smart  woman = romance 
Smart man + dumb  woman = affair 
Dumb man + smart  woman = marriage 
Dumb man + dumb  woman = pregnancy 
______________________________     


OFFICE  ARITHMETIC
  


Smart  boss + smart employee = profit 
Smart  boss + dumb employee = production 
Dumb boss + smart  employee = promotion 
Dumb  boss + dumb employee = overtime 
_____________________________   
  


SHOPPING  MATH
  


A man  will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs. 
A woman will pay $10  for a $20 item that she doesn't need. 
_____________________________   
  


GENERAL  EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
  


A woman  worries about the future until she gets a husband. 
A man never worries  about the future until he gets a wife. 
A successful man is one  who makes more money than his wife can spend. 
A successful woman is  one who can find such a man. 
_____________________________   
  


HAPPINESS
  


To be  happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a  little. 
To be happy with a  woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at  all. 
______________________________   
  


LONGEVITY
  


Married  men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to  die. 
______________________________   
  


PROPENSITY  TO CHANGE
  


A woman  marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. 
A man marries a woman  expecting that she won't change, and she does. 
_____________________________   
  


DISCUSSION  TECHNIQUE
  


A woman  has the last word in any argument. 
Anything a man says  after that is the beginning of a new argument. 
_____________________________   
HOW  TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED   
Old aunts used to  come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me,  "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at  funerals. 
  


SEND  THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO THE SMART GUYS YOU KNOW CAN  HANDLE IT.
  





    
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